Mrs. Noah, Priscilla, Mrs. Peter, wives of other of the apostles, and others were the wives of preachers (cf. I Corinthians 9:5).

Just who is a preacher’s wife, and what does she do? She often lives in the shadows. She spends many lonely hours due to the nature of her husband’s work. Because of the same, she is often the primary one responsible for child rearing, educating them, disciplining them, and all the other responsibilities involved. At times she is called upon to move and make the many adjustments that attend such. She often works long hours for the church herself, usually without pay.

Let’s take a closer look at this woman, the preacher’s wife:

  1. The Roles She Plays
    1. She is a wife
    2. She is (usually) a mother
    3. She is, or eventually will be (in most instances) a grandmother. [Just because the nest is empty does not mean life is empty.]
    4. She is a teacher
    5. She is a leader among women
    6. She is a confidant and listener
    7. She is a comforter to others
    8. She is an encourager
      1. To her husband
      2. To her children
      3. To other ladies
    9. She is an example
      1. In her apparel
      2. In her attitude
  2. The Qualities She Possesses
    1. She is hospitable
    2. She is sociable
    3. She is impartial
    4. She is warm and friendly
    5. She is not timid, shy, retiring
    6. She is resilient
    7. She is trustworthy
    8. She is neat and orderly; carries herself with dignity
  3. Her Relationship to Her Husband
    1. She is his number one encourager
    2. She is his trusted critic and adviser
    3. She is his confidant (Prov. 31:11)
    4. She is his sounding board (at times, the only one he has)
    5. She is a trusted and loyal member of the team
  4. Suggestions for the Preacher’s Wife
    1. Learn how to handle criticism
      1. Remember, the Lord Himself was criticized
      2. Remember, the prophets and apostles were criticized
      3. Learn from criticism
      4. Always keep in mind Whom you are serving
      5. Remember that it is normal to hurt, but hurting is only temporary
      6. Be sure it’s criticism
      7. Conquer criticism itself
      8. Conquer self-pity
      9. Don’t be thin-skinned
      10. Build self-confidence
      11. Don’t think you have to move very time you are criticized
    2. Learn time management
      1. Avoid the trivial
      2. Learn to say “No”
      3. Place a high priority on family
      4. Allow time for yourself
      5. Avoid exhaustion
      6. Learn how to get into and out of friendships
      7. Don’t rear your children in an atmosphere of frenzy
      8. Remember, you don’t owe people an explanation!
  5. Suggestions for Preachers
    1. Remember that she needs your attention
    2. Ask yourself, “Will her experience as a preacher’s wife be memorable or miserable?”
    3. Remember that you are her preacher (don’t disappoint her)
    4. Be understanding about her feelings; don’t minimize her hurt
    5. Give her assurance; stand for, with, and by her
    6. Encourage her individually
    7. Listen to her advice, insight, and intelligence
    8. Spend time with her (I Pet. 3:7- “together”)
    9. Use your cell phone and email (both to keep in touch with her and to communicate with others to make time for her)
    10. Provide her with leisure time for herself
    11. Help her to grow
  6. Suggestions for Congregations
    1. Let her be normal
    2. Let her have friends (close ones)
    3. Do not expect the unreasonable of her
    4. Do not expect her to talk about church problems
    5. Give her time to mature
    6. Do not make her, or allow her to be, the object of criticism